I love the 100-age pages rule -- I'm making a note. My stepmother said something to me years ago that I didn't appreciate until much later (mostly because I thought it was backhanded); she complimented me on being able to quit. This was back when I was in my 20s and never lasting more than a year at any job because I'd always wind up bored out of my mind. But when I finally mustered the courage to walk away from my first marriage, she reiterated the sentiment, and I realized that she'd been sincere. Walking away was the hardest thing I had ever done up to that point, and I should have done it sooner, but I'm still grateful every single day that I managed to do it at all. Like your mom knew -- you have to make space in your life for the actual good stuff. If you're spending too much energy on pursuits or relationships that wear you down, it's impossible to find time for those that delight you. Why pay twice indeed!
Wow, I commend you for managing to get out of a bad marriage. I have many friends who have done the same, and not a single one has regretted it--quite the contrary in fact. Good for you!
I like that you linked to the poker player because I had Kenny Rogers' "The Gambler" running through my head as I read this. "You gotta know when to hold 'em. Know when to fold 'em. Know when to walk away. Know when to run."
Myself, I quit professions. Teaching English, accounting, and the law. Each time right when things were going well, when I was on "top of my game". It often doesn't look good in others' eyes. People assume something must have gone wrong. "Why would you walk (run?) away from a good thing?" For me it's always felt natural. Quitting from boredom I guess?
The only thing I disagree with is that that extraordinary piece is "easy" to make sound so professional. My right hand began to ache half way through - just from listening!!! Love you -L
Mari, once again you have written a column that speaks so movingly to me. As you know, I have made the decision not to return to clinical work in nursing--for the moment at least. It was a very hard decision and makes me very sad, but health care workers are really suffering right now in large part because of Covid and the capitalist takeover of health care. I could not do the job of a bedside nurse under the present conditions, and that feeling is shared by thousands of nurses all over the country post-Covid and indeed all over the world. For me, walking away was the right choice, even though it does not feel good that I had to make that choice.
I know it was a difficult decision, but it was the right one for you and your family. Besides, it is useful information for those in charge of our healthcare system that medical professionals are leaving. If hospitals want to have enough nurses to be able to run, they need to pay them more and hire enough staff that the job isn’t totally exhausting (which is bad for patients, as you have pointed out). It’s basic economics!
Excellent point. You’re reminding me of the Swiss watch industry, which is only about ten percent of what it was a hundred years ago. The Swiss make precision mechanical watches. When quartz watches were invented, the Swiss watchmakers said, “Nah. We like our way better and are sticking with it.” The result was that quartz watches made by Japanese companies totally took over the market, and the Swiss watch industry completely collapsed. To this day the canton where watchmaking is located--Neuchâtel--is very depressed, has high unemployment, and requires government support. And all because the companies didn’t want to quit their way of doing things when a new technology came along.
Running a great while your body lasts, but once you get injured, walking and hiking not only feel better but are better for us. Good for you for quitting and switching to something better!
I love the 100-age pages rule -- I'm making a note. My stepmother said something to me years ago that I didn't appreciate until much later (mostly because I thought it was backhanded); she complimented me on being able to quit. This was back when I was in my 20s and never lasting more than a year at any job because I'd always wind up bored out of my mind. But when I finally mustered the courage to walk away from my first marriage, she reiterated the sentiment, and I realized that she'd been sincere. Walking away was the hardest thing I had ever done up to that point, and I should have done it sooner, but I'm still grateful every single day that I managed to do it at all. Like your mom knew -- you have to make space in your life for the actual good stuff. If you're spending too much energy on pursuits or relationships that wear you down, it's impossible to find time for those that delight you. Why pay twice indeed!
Wow, I commend you for managing to get out of a bad marriage. I have many friends who have done the same, and not a single one has regretted it--quite the contrary in fact. Good for you!
I like that you linked to the poker player because I had Kenny Rogers' "The Gambler" running through my head as I read this. "You gotta know when to hold 'em. Know when to fold 'em. Know when to walk away. Know when to run."
Myself, I quit professions. Teaching English, accounting, and the law. Each time right when things were going well, when I was on "top of my game". It often doesn't look good in others' eyes. People assume something must have gone wrong. "Why would you walk (run?) away from a good thing?" For me it's always felt natural. Quitting from boredom I guess?
Boredom is an excellent reason to quit something!
And now I have that song going through my head too! 😂
The only thing I disagree with is that that extraordinary piece is "easy" to make sound so professional. My right hand began to ache half way through - just from listening!!! Love you -L
Ha! Well, I didn’t play it quite that fast. But that piece is all in the fingering, which my teacher helped me with.
Mari, once again you have written a column that speaks so movingly to me. As you know, I have made the decision not to return to clinical work in nursing--for the moment at least. It was a very hard decision and makes me very sad, but health care workers are really suffering right now in large part because of Covid and the capitalist takeover of health care. I could not do the job of a bedside nurse under the present conditions, and that feeling is shared by thousands of nurses all over the country post-Covid and indeed all over the world. For me, walking away was the right choice, even though it does not feel good that I had to make that choice.
I know it was a difficult decision, but it was the right one for you and your family. Besides, it is useful information for those in charge of our healthcare system that medical professionals are leaving. If hospitals want to have enough nurses to be able to run, they need to pay them more and hire enough staff that the job isn’t totally exhausting (which is bad for patients, as you have pointed out). It’s basic economics!
Would add that quitting is necessary for companies, otherwise you can have decades of failure (remains to see if Meta sticks with their Metaverse).
Excellent point. You’re reminding me of the Swiss watch industry, which is only about ten percent of what it was a hundred years ago. The Swiss make precision mechanical watches. When quartz watches were invented, the Swiss watchmakers said, “Nah. We like our way better and are sticking with it.” The result was that quartz watches made by Japanese companies totally took over the market, and the Swiss watch industry completely collapsed. To this day the canton where watchmaking is located--Neuchâtel--is very depressed, has high unemployment, and requires government support. And all because the companies didn’t want to quit their way of doing things when a new technology came along.
Lifting weights and running after two decades. Switched to walking and hiking and never looked back.
Running a great while your body lasts, but once you get injured, walking and hiking not only feel better but are better for us. Good for you for quitting and switching to something better!
That photo _does_ look scary Mari!!
I’ve quit many things, especially books, although I feel a bit of a failure when I do. I like that age / pages rule!
Thank you for your support about the photo! It was indeed scary!